Slugs

Now, I said I wasn't going to get into this, but these guys don't count. I feel like I need to educate you about some lesser known things, and I want it out there. I always wondered what kind of person exalts themselves, and gets off on dominating you, when you're not within arms reach to slap the shit out of them. I will tell you, and it's one that everyone should know better about but it expresses itself in ways that are much bigger and bolder than what it really is.

So this is what they are, and I know it. They are little overweight toy dogs cowardly rolling on their backs, exposing their bellies. Like an armadillo who walks into the porch light and under your nose and suddenly realizes he has been exposed and is now writhing on the ground and trying to burrow. Some people describe them as slugs. So now when you hear that big loud booming voice, nine times out of ten, they're slugs. Nobody calls me bitch from the bushes and gets my respect. Better believe it.

I love and still have the utmost respect for friendly, but when you're a box of kittens, just be a box of kittens. They're great.